Category: Date Bail

He’s Wearing My Dress?

A few years ago I met a man online that seemed like quite the catch. Beautiful voice, we had a nice dinner and made plans for the following weekend.

After dinner, we went back to his place…Very flirty, very attractive man, with that wonderful Virginia silk voice.

He makes us a drink and some snacks and I took off my dress and got into the hot tub with panties on, figuring he would join me..

Well, a few minutes later, he comes sashaying out and parades around the hot tub…WEARING MY DRESS! I’m 5’4, he was 6’4, so needless to say, there were things showing (for some reason, he was naked under MY DRESS), that I wasn’t comfortable seeing, sticking out of the bottom of my dress.

I got out of the hot tub and told him to take off my dress. He did, and followed me bare assed naked out the front door apologizing.

I just could not see me going out with a guy that looks better in my clothes than I do!

Three Women Waving

I’d been chatting online for a little while to this lady and I spoke to her on the phone once too. She sounded ok, but was a bit unsure about all this. She told me she had never done any online dating before, so she was understandably feeling quite nervous.

Anyway we arranged to meet up at this pub and she had asked me to text her once I had arrived. I did as she asked and within a few moments she came to the door as she was already inside the pub.

Whilst we were talking I asked her how she got here and she said she was given a lift by some friends of hers. I asked her “so your friends dropped you off then?” She replied “no, they’re sitting over there!” I turned round and looked to see three women sitting at a table in the far corner of the bar waving at me!

My date told me to just ignore her friends, but it didn’t stop me feeling like a nervous wreck lol. The conversation between us began to dry up after that. My date suddenly then started showing signs of being in pain. She told me she was feeling unwell and needed to visit the facilities. She was in there for what seemed a very long time before she came out again. When she finally did she told me she was really sorry, but she needed to go home as she was feeling so ill. She told me she felt bad as I had traveled all the way out to this pub to meet her only for her to suddenly have to go like this. I said “no worries, it’s one of those things and sorry she was not feeling well”. I went on my way leaving my date at the pub with her friends, so whether she did actually go home at that point remained a mystery.

So a very short and “unusual” date lol!:-)

Leopard Print Bedspread

Went out with my mom’s co-worker (he was a contracted employee who would come out to her work site every so often and always complimented the pic of me on her desk)… He suggested getting together at a local coffee shop, something simple. The man was already there when I arrived, but had been up to the counter and gotten his drink, and as I intro’d myself he said, “Hey are you going to get yourself coffee or what?” …so I bought my own damn house blend, and sat down to hear him talk about how he had just been to see his dad, and how hard it had been since moving out of his parents’ house (he was 28!!) then immediately BEGAN CRYING HEAVILY, and after about 10 minutes of trying to figure out whether I was being punk’d, I suggested that maybe we should take a walk — to the parking lot, so I could leave. He tried, last minute, to convince me to go home with him for “company” so I could see his LEOPARD PRINT bedspread and his REALISTIC SUIT OF ARMOR (oh, my goodness). I had to take a pass on that one. He began crying again, and shouted out loud at me, in the middle of the parking lot “WHYYYYY won’t you go home with MEEEE?” Holy crap. I got in the car, drove home, and called my mother— who laughed her butt off. She told me he kept asking about me for months afterward. Freaky.

Earth Mama

My girlfriend reluctantly set me up with a blind date. Her friend had seen a picture of me and really wanted to meet me. She didn’t think he was my type, but I told her I’d give it a try. My date had long scraggly hair and beard, and wore dirty ‘hippie’ clothes. He took one look at me and said I was his earth mama, he wanted to get married, have babies with me and live off the land. (He was serious). Halfway through lunch, I went to the bathroom, managed to get to the cashier without him seeing me, paid for my share of the lunch and left as fast as I could.


In The Closet?

On a first date…talking about everything from A to Z. Arts, symphony, opera, world events, cooking, our jobs, etc.

I happen to mention in passing that the one thing I never knew about was high thread count sheets, but once I slept on them, I would never sleep on anything else…

She looks at me and says “Are you sure you’re not gay?” and me being quick witted said: “Actually, yes, I am, you got me. I’m just a lesbian trapped in a man’s body and you aren’t going to do it for me, honey, because I’m not into bull dykes”. Then I got up and left. Oh, the look on her face.

Roses from Florist $35
Dinner at Restaurant $85
Look on her face after I put her in her place? Priceless…

I’m me…period…I don’t fit in a neat cubbyhole. And all my friends that are gay know for sure I’m not, so if their “gaydar” ain’t going off, why she would ask me that question I haven’t got a clue. I mean, I was on a date with a woman so where the hell did that question come from?

So Ugly And Fat

Gosh, the horror of being stood up!

I’ve been stood up one before and it was the most humiliating and disturbing dating scenario. I felt so ugly and fat. My date did call and say he’d make it to the date, but he didn’t arrive even an hour after I got there. Thankfully though, I called another guy friend up and asked him to pick me up.

I was so humiliated by the whole experience that it took me a few weeks to date again. I only wish I could have met that guy who dumped me. What made the whole thing so much worse was the fact that it was a blind date. There was always a burning question behind my head if he actually got there and walked away! Ugh, the humiliation of it all!

Movie Mayhem

I had a guy I met from online after quite a long time talking to him over weeks and weeks. I agreed to meet him for a bite to eat. Things went well. Then he said would you go to a movie, I would like to spend more time with you. So, I went. He asked what I wanted to see, every time I picked one he didn’t like it. Then he picked the only movie no one has ever heard of. We went to the bar area to wait, within ten minutes he stood up, pulled out my ticket laid it on the counter and said I will be right back, 30 minutes then 45 went by and he did not come back. I walked outside and he was in his car on his cell phone!! He had been watching for me, jumped out of his car and started running over. Immediately I began to cry, turned around and ran inside, trying to get someone to come get me. It was humiliating!! Of course, he apologized tons but it was rude and too late!!


Starbucks Surveillance

Actually I do have a story similar to this. It happened the first and only time I agreed to meet someone I “met” on POF (Plenty of Fish) online without seeing a picture of them first. We had emailed back and forth and talked on the phone prior to meeting and decided to meet at Starbucks over a coffee.

We arranged a time to meet and discussed what each of us would be wearing so we could recognize each other. I went there did not see anyone who matched her description but did see a woman who looked her age and body type height waiting in a corner. I hung around for about 20 min while I had a coffee and did not see her so I left figuring I had been stood up.

I phoned her after the meet and she said she had chickened out on the meet. I did not bother to communicate with her further. Some months later I noticed her profile on POF again this time with pictures. I turned out that she was the lady in the corner of Starbucks in disguise. To me that is just weird behavior for a woman in her 50’s. I kind of felt like I was under surveillance.

Herbert Hoover

Since I’ve been asked more then once if my somewhat ample breasts are real I decided to think about a smart ass answer if it happened again. Sure enough I was on a first date with this man when no more then ten minutes into the date he stares at my bosom and asks “Are those real?” Instead of just laughing and getting up and leaving, my usual response, I counter with a question to him. I asked “are you like most men and have your own special name for your, um, package?” He sort of smirked and said well yeah, I guess. So I replied, “well I have my own special name for each of my breasts.” Now he was looking with interest at eyes instead of my bosom. “So what’s their names,’ he asks. I look deep into his eyes while pointing at my breasts and say, “well, the right one I call Herbert and the left one is Hoover.” He looks at me somewhat confused and says, “why did you name them that?” I smile and reply, “because whenever men see them unveiled they always say, “damn!” Then I got up and left.

The Vest

I had a first date with this guy. I myself, showered, blow dried my hair, make-up, high heels, nice, clean pressed dress – very smart. Met my date in a pub. He was wearing dirty old jeans – scruffy black boots and wait for it – A VEST! (with his dinner dribbled down the front of it) I left very quickly. He e-mailed me later and said he didn’t understand how I knew we were not suitable?