Tag: dinner

First Date Fight Club

I met this guy from another site. We went to dinner. So far so good. Then he asks if I wanted to get drinks. I said sure, why not. So we go to some fight club situation. I don’t even remember where it was. He tells me to take a seat and wait here. Next thing I know he’s in the ring. He then proceeded to get his ass kicked and he got knocked out. I got up and left. So not a very good idea to schedule a boxing match and lose for a first date guys.

Breast Feeding

Went on a first date with a woman from POF (Plenty of Fish), about two years ago. Drove an hour and a half to meet her. We had talked via email, phone calls, texts for about two weeks before we decided to meet, and actually talked the morning of our first meeting, and confirmed our date, which gave her ample time to set me up for what I was in store for.

So I get to the restaurant, which wasn’t five stars, but wasn’t a dive either. Nice place for a first date, I had made reservations for two. I got there a little early, so was at the bar waiting for her to show up. So she shows up in tow with her two young daughters, a 3 yr old and an 16 month old, so there went the table for two, had to wait an hour to get another table that could accommodate two high chairs. And that isn’t even the best part, half way through dinner, she proceeds to start breast feeding the youngest right there in front of me at the table. Not that that big deal, nor did I really care, the only thing that got me is she wasn’t planning on getting a sitter, she could of told me and I would have picked a more appropriate place to meet. Oh well, live and learn.

He’s Wearing My Dress?

A few years ago I met a man online that seemed like quite the catch. Beautiful voice, we had a nice dinner and made plans for the following weekend.

After dinner, we went back to his place…Very flirty, very attractive man, with that wonderful Virginia silk voice.

He makes us a drink and some snacks and I took off my dress and got into the hot tub with panties on, figuring he would join me..

Well, a few minutes later, he comes sashaying out and parades around the hot tub…WEARING MY DRESS! I’m 5’4, he was 6’4, so needless to say, there were things showing (for some reason, he was naked under MY DRESS), that I wasn’t comfortable seeing, sticking out of the bottom of my dress.

I got out of the hot tub and told him to take off my dress. He did, and followed me bare assed naked out the front door apologizing.

I just could not see me going out with a guy that looks better in my clothes than I do!

He’s a Spanker

My story starts well enough had just put up my first profile post divorce and to my surprise had many replies. One stood out right: age range, common interests, good banter on line, and by phone…he invited me to a lovely restaurant for dinner…with the excitement of a school girl I got ready for my first date…

Arrived at the meet and got a seat at the bar … he called and said he was running late would be there shortly… an hour later he showed up 3 sheets to the wind… (I know should have jumped ship but was still somewhat naive) we got a table and ordered after spending half the date on his cell and going outside to smoke (a fact omitted in his profile) he leaned across the table and while staring deeply into my eyes whispered I want to take you home and spank you.. Taken aback not having dated since my 20’s and never having run across a “spanker” before my arm shot up and I screamed check please… LOL He was not all bad. He quickly said, oh no, my treat!

In The Closet?

On a first date…talking about everything from A to Z. Arts, symphony, opera, world events, cooking, our jobs, etc.

I happen to mention in passing that the one thing I never knew about was high thread count sheets, but once I slept on them, I would never sleep on anything else…

She looks at me and says “Are you sure you’re not gay?” and me being quick witted said: “Actually, yes, I am, you got me. I’m just a lesbian trapped in a man’s body and you aren’t going to do it for me, honey, because I’m not into bull dykes”. Then I got up and left. Oh, the look on her face.

Roses from Florist $35
Dinner at Restaurant $85
Look on her face after I put her in her place? Priceless…

I’m me…period…I don’t fit in a neat cubbyhole. And all my friends that are gay know for sure I’m not, so if their “gaydar” ain’t going off, why she would ask me that question I haven’t got a clue. I mean, I was on a date with a woman so where the hell did that question come from?

BTW, I Hate Women

This was the worst/scariest first date I ever went on with anyone. I met this guy through a dating sight. He seemed real nice and we seemed to have a lot in common. Finally we agreed to meet and have a date. I met him near his school and had to take the train home with him to his house since there is no parking at the college he was attending. So we did that. We got in his car and went to dinner, nice restaurant I had never been to it before it seemed like it was going to be a nice night. Well half way into the appetizer he says give me a kiss, and act like you mean it. I said what? I don’t know you well enough yet. He grabs my hand and says I hate f@#*ingc@#*sucking bitches!!! I said “WHAT?” He goes you heard me bitch, I hate women like you. I NEVER not once throughout our short period of time together ever gave him the wrong idea. I was so happy to see one of my brother’s friends (who was also sadly there on a date) I went to him and said the guy I’m here with is a psycho. Please help me. I sat with him and his date for dinner while the other guy kept glaring at me the whole time. When we left he was in his car waiting for us. He tried to follow us home but my brother’s friend lost him. Maybe he was a serial killer or something. I’m sure it would not have ended up good.

The Worst Toupee

I just have to tell my bad date story…

I had been talking to this lawyer that lived about 3 hours away from me…

Saw his photo and he was very nice looking…we talked nightly and had some good conversations…

One day he called and said that he had to go thru my town going to take a deposition in a town a couple of hours away. He suggested that he come down as far as my town and we meet, go out, and then I could go with him the next day and then he would reverse the route.

When I opened the door to the motel this is what I saw.

A very large man with the worst toupee on that I had ever seen. He was wearing silk basketball shorts, a white long sleeved starched shirt, socks with colored stripes at the top pulled up to his knees and black dress shoes.

Now I think of myself a decent person and will be nice to everyone. I was nice and we went across the street to eat dinner… all thru dinner I was trying to think of an excuse not to go with him the next day. He looked at me and said “what’s the matter, you look like you have a bad headache” ding!!! I responded that I did and needed to go home…

After tossing all night, I finally got the nerve to call him at the motel and when I did the desk clerk told me that he had checked out about an hour earlier…

Bless his heart, I guess this wasn’t the first time he had been dumped!

Terror on the Terrace

Met a woman online, emailed and chatted on the phone, set up a dinner date. We met, sat out on the terrace and had a great dinner and conversation. As we finished coffee the waiter came and took the check. As he left, she smiled and leaned over the table and said “my place or yours?” I was kinda like a deer in the headlights. Stupidly I said “Gee I thought we’d get to know each other better before we got to that”, I’m not a first date sex kinda guy. The terrace had filled up with about 25 people at 10 or 12 tables around us. She now changed her expression and stood up and said in a loud voice “WHAT?? I am not good enough to GO TO BED WITH?!?!” Of course everyone turned to look at me, and I wanted to crawl under the table.

The waiter returned with the receipt, and while she ranted on, I quickly signed it and fled, with her still yelling behind me. Needless to say, I never returned to that restaurant for dates. Maybe it was the food or just the atmosphere, crazy huh?

OyVay…